here we go again:/

It was dangerous, but I knew that I had to do it.

In front of me is the person who loves me the most. He did everything to protect me, even the worst. Yet I am selfish, thinking only of myself. Time and time again, I abandoned him when he was at his worst. We've been through really bad things, and he's always protected me, even when it's hurting him. The only thing he needed was me by his side, but I couldn't.

At midnight tonight, he sneaks up to the basement, carrying a paper knife, he intends to kill himself. But now that I'm here, I'll prevent that at all costs.

He was surprised to see me, his whole body was shaking, and his mouth was always muttering "everything will be okay...". I walked over and gently approached him. Suddenly, he was startled, his face was full of fear, took a knife and rushed towards me. Reflexively, I reached out my hand to fend off. A sharp knife slashed my biceps, blood started to gush from the wound. I winced in pain, but I had to endure it. He struggled and protested violently when I tried to hold his hand tight. He shouted: "Let me go! I have to eliminate that thing! It's harmed you and her!". But of course, there's no such thing as "that thing", it's just his illusion. The trauma was so strong that his mind was no longer awake. I smacked him in the face, he staggered back, but contrary to my expectations, he didn't calm down but rushed at me even more furiously. After struggling for a while, both he and I were covered with cuts, scrapes and bruises. Then came the decisive moment. He panted a bit then charged at me with all his might. My hands were controlled by him with one hand, the other hand grasped the paper knife, stabbing a fatal blow to my right eye. I fell to the floor. My vision blurred, and my mind gradually became hazy. The last image I remember is of him jerking awake, dropping his knife, his face showing regret and fear, and then he rushes downstairs.

I dreamed a dream. in that dream, my closest friends comforted and encouraged me, they said they always love me and won't hate me no matter what kind of person I am. Then I saw him. He was leaning against a tree and sobbing like a baby. No, even now he's still a kid, and me too. I walked over to him and hugged him, trying to soothe him with the warmth of my body. I've decided. People forgive me or not, it doesn't matter anymore. I will leave everything to protect him, once and for all.

I woke up in a dark room with an eyepatch and a patient suit, only the light of the moon shining through the window. I opened the door and stepped outside. The hospital corridor has only a few lights, they blink continuously. I subconsciously walked to a door. I opened the door, inside was a bed, he was lying there. The wounds I had caused were all over his face. I gently walked over to him, grabbed his hand, and he opened his eyes to look at me. I spoke the words that have been written in my head before: